When attending the funeral of a loved one, close friend or in support of another griever, it can be hard to know what the etiquette for bereavement offerings are. With today’s multicultural Australia, we are surrounded by a wonderful diversity, which can make it even more difficult when wishing to respect peoples cultural customs and personal preferences. It's hard to know whether to take flowers, or what to give instead of flowers at a funeral or memorial.
For a long time, flowers have been commonly seen at funerals as an offering to the family and are broadly accepted across most cultural and religious settings. Your lady funeral director can make you aware of what to give instead of flowers if they aren’t culturally accepted for the service you are attending.
There are some alternative options to flowers that are commonly accepted as bereavement gifts. These gifts can support the family in a different way, though it's important to check each is appropriate for the family to accept as some cultures have rules around food and charity.
What to give instead of flowers
Charitable Donation
When receiving notice of a funeral, there may be a direction to offer a donation to a predetermined charity over offering flowers. When donating to a charity on behalf of the deceased, it is important to include the details of the family with your donation directly to the charity, so they can notify the family of donations received in their loved ones name. It’s important if you choose to donate to do so in a timely fashion and to the charity of their choosing. If you are not sure which charity it is, speak to our lady funeral directors who can help guide you, as they have organised of the service.
Photo and letter memorial book
If you knew the deceased and their family and friends well, a photo album, letter book or scrapbook of collected thoughts, feelings and memories can be a personal and touching gift. When collecting photos for the pages, try to go to sources outside the families for moments they might not have photos from themselves. Keep letters only from people who were close with the departed and the family. This gift offering can be a more comfortable gift for those who have trouble with etiquette and can be an easier gift for people in a less formal setting. Here are some tips to make a scrapbook if you’d like some help getting started.
Food offerings
Offering consumables to the family who are coping with the loss of a loved one can be a good support. It’s important to consider when you are going to drop around food, and what kind of food you are considering. Often the first few weeks there can be too much to even eat. Consider taking snack foods with longer shelf lives, gift cards for local restaurants or services like menulog or even doing a grocery run of toiletries, and other home necessities. Food is often appreciated, even if it doesn't seem so at the time. If you aren’t sure about food, and would still like to help, perhaps a gift card for a cleaning lady or coming to do it yourself is an option that surely lightens the load on the family of the bereaved.
Flowers
If you decide to take flowers to the funeral home as a bereavement gift to the family, it’s good to plan in advance. It can be hard to know exactly what are the most appropriate funeral flowers. The all lady funeral director team at Lady Anne Funerals are on hand to help you with the most appropriate floral offering. It’s can also be useful to know why flowers have been used historically to accompany funeral ceremonies to decide whether it is appropriate in the setting.
All families are different and can have different needs and wants for the funeral service of their loved one. Ensure the information we have outlined is applied with respects to the personality of the family. At Lady Anne funerals, we can always support you through making decisions when paying your respects, or to help you decide what is appropriate. For other helpful articles like this, please join our Facebook community where we share messages like these every week. You can join by clicking on the button below.
